Husband Smarts

Majority of the time I think I am way smarter than Husband.

And then this happens and I am reminded that I’m really not.

Last Saturday evening, Husband and I were invited to celebrate the birthdays of two of our close friends. Every year, their party is themed white party, and everyone is requested to wear white attire.

So, there we were all dressed up and looking kick ass in our white outfits. We looked so good that I desperately wanted to take a picture of both of us together to post on my Facebook page.

Me:        Crap, I really want to get a picture of two of us in our white outfits. How?

Husb:    Hmm…think Julie.

I’m fiddling around with my iPhone camera app, and trying to take a self-portrait of us by holding my phone at an arms length away. Obviously, since I don’t have redonkulously long arms, I fail to get any of our white outfits and only our face.

Me:        Fuck. HOW are we going to do this?

Husb:    Really? Think Julie. How do you normally take pictures of your outfit and send it to me when you’re by yourself?

Me:        Um….

Husb:    Come on. It’s not a trick question.

Me:        Should we…ask the fish to take it?

Husb:    WTF is wrong with you? THINK!

Me:        Look. I DON’T KNOW, okay?

Husb: Sigh. Why did we buy that full-length mirror in the bedroom for?

Me:        That’s the sex mirror.

Husb:    Yes, AND we can use it for…taking full length pictures!

Me:        Oh. HAHAHA. Get the fish to do it. Fuck I’m funny!

Husb:    You’re an idiot.

And just when you think I couldn’t get any dumber, this conversation happened on Sunday.

Husband has been slightly obsessed with going to visit North Korea recently:

Me:        What are you reading? Your book on how to get to that part of Korea?

Husb:    What do you mean ‘that part of Korea’? Don’t you know which part is the one that’s difficult to get into?

Me:        North? South? My grasp on all things geographical is pretty poor.

Husb:    Why don’t you take a guess? It’s a 50/50 chance…

Me:        South?

Husb:    South is where CY is from.

Me:        Oh. North?

Husb:    Of course it’s North you idiot.

Me:        Well. It was a 50/50 chance.

Husb:    And you still fucked it up.

Me:        The odds were not in my favor.

Oh Husband. At times you are slightly smarter than I. Mostly on the things that no one cares about.

Anywho – I am flying first class to Hawaii tomorrow for my good friend’s wedding. Before you get all excited about first class, let me remind you that I’m flying first class Delta, which is probably comparable to coach on any updated decent plane.

I may be offline for a while, but please check back for Trophy Wife in Hawaii updates. Aloha! Bring on the coconut bras and grass skirts!


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  1. Ben - October 25, 2012 5:03 PM

    That was a pleasure to read. x

  2. H - December 10, 2012 11:06 PM

    I have the “self timer app” for times like these ;P


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